Number two: Admitting Self-Centered Nature
So, in this fantasy world, it would be very healing to hear something like, “Once you were addicted to me, I had you where I wanted you. You’d do just about anything to get my love and approval. I just had to pull away, express disappointment, make you feel guilty, or pull on your empathy strings, and you’d jump at the opportunity to cater to the relentless demands of my five indulgent selves: selfishness, self-absorption, self-centeredness, self-importance, and self-service. I was always happy to take and receive with an air of entitlement, but then I’d conveniently dismiss your needs and disappear when it was time to give in return.”
Of course, a narcissist will never admit this in reality because it would completely shatter their helpless victim identity and threaten their ability to control you. It’s important to understand that a narcissist’s behavior is rooted in a deep-seated need to manipulate and dominate others. Their actions are designed to sustain their self-esteem, reduce their anxiety, and fulfill their needs and desires without any regard for you or your well-being.
Number three: Acknowledge the Lack of Empathy
Here, you might need to hear something like, “Just for a moment, I will try my best to sincerely put myself in your shoes and try to imagine what it must have felt like to be strung along for such a long period in such a chaotic and one-sided relationship.
Oh, but wait, I can’t feel any empathy towards others, especially men that I’m romantically involved with. Of course, I’m good at acting like a caring, self-aware, spiritual, and highly empathetic person to keep my mask of vulnerability intact, but in truth, any empathy I do genuinely feel is reserved for me, myself, and I.”
So, the reason you will never hear any of this from a narcissist is that acknowledging these things would require them to confront the false image they have of themselves and the endlessly misunderstood victim identity that they hold. So, it is helpful to understand that a narcissist either doesn’t have the capacity for empathy, and they don’t feel guilt or remorse for what they are doing to you.
Continue reading on the next page
Sharing Is Caring!
