Number 2: You Crave Validation
Number two, you crave validation. All of these things, to some extent, are perfectly fine. They become unhealthy when you’re unhealed. So, all of this has to do with you because if you’re unhealed, you’re going to do all of these things in an unhealthy way. If you’re unhealed, you’re going to be attracted to someone toxic and narcissistic because your boundaries, and your standards just like the bare minimum of what a relationship should look like and feel like are not okay. They’re tainted. They’re unhealthy. You haven’t even really learned what it should look like and feel like to be with a healthy person, nor are you healthy yourself.
I think craving validation is probably the easiest vibe to spot. You are just a needy person, and it’s okay that you’re needy because you’re aware of it. It’s not okay that you’re needy, but it’s okay that you’re starting to become self-aware that you know that you can be needy at times. What does that mean? You’re constantly asking people their opinions and what they think. You justify your own decisions. You want to make sure that you’re making the right choice like you need that constant validation. You say yes to everything. You ask people if you’re doing a good job like you need someone to tell you that you’re enough because you don’t know how to fill your tank up.
When you become healthy and you start healing a lot of the stuff that’s going on inside of you, then you don’t crave validation from anyone, and you’re fine if someone doesn’t give it to you because you don’t need it to feel good. When you’re unhealed, you will crave it, and when someone doesn’t give it to you, you’re going to get nasty. You’re going to go toe-to-toe with this person. You’re going to want to fight back, or you’re just going to think that they’re not giving you what it is that you need when maybe what you need is unhealthy.
The shift that needs to happen so you can be healthy and not be a target for this person is going to be you building up your self-confidence. Again, I’m sorry, but you’re going to have to heal. You’re going to have to work on all of your abandonment stuff, like all of your emotional wounds. I’m sorry, you’re going to have to do the work. You’re going to have to learn self-parenting. You’re going to have to learn how to be emotionally, and mentally healthy, take care of yourself, rebuild your identity, and work on self-confidence.
Now, I know all of that seems like a lot, but it’s not a lot because you’re taking baby steps every single day. So, you’re going from 1 to 2, to 2 to 3. We don’t have to get so overwhelmed with, “Oh my God, I need to heal everything!” Nope, nope, nope let’s just start with the basics. When I go over all of the stuff in my master class I’ll link it down below, I’ll link it up here this is a great, great course because it gives you all the information. You have access to me also while you’re going through this, and it kind of gives you, like, the step-by-step guide of how to overcome some stuff, heal yourself, and become healthy. If you guys are interested, I suggest starting it today.
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