Narcissists can be difficult to deal with and sometimes even harder to get over. They can break you down to the point that you feel like you’ll never be able to live a normal life again. And sometimes it feels like no matter what you do, they always win.
And when they’ve finally broken you down, then they’ll move on to someone else- just like nothing ever happened. Here are 10 things that narcissists destroy to break you down and make you feel worse.
Number 1: Your confidence.
The first thing narcissists do is destroy your confidence, they’ll tell you that you’re not good enough or that you’ll never succeed. They’ll make fun of your idea, work ethic, or appearance. Anything they can do to make you feel unworthy is fair game for them.
They don’t just want to destroy you; they want to make sure you never get back up again. Narcissists want you to believe that you can’t do anything right. And they’ll do everything to make sure that’s true.
They don’t just tell you that you’re not good enough; they actually make you believe it. They’ll make you think that you can’t do anything right. And when they finally leave, all the confidence they took from you is gone.
Number 2 Your Self-Esteem.
They want you to feel small and insignificant so that they can feel significant and important. When you’re around narcissists, it’s easy to start questioning yourself. And they’ll use this as an opportunity to make themselves seem superior by comparison.
Narcissists undermine your confidence in yourself and make you question whether or not you deserve better treatment than what they’re giving you. They are masters at destroying your self-esteem, they’ll do it by attacking your character and making you feel like there’s no way you can do anything right.
They do this by devaluing you, your feelings, and your thoughts; they’ll also often call you names to make you feel bad about yourself. They want to make sure they’re the ones who get all the attention in adoration. So, narcissists do whatever they can to make sure you don’t get any of it.
Number 3: Your Sense Of Safety, Security, And Stability In Life.
The narcissist won’t just try to break down your self-esteem, they’ll also try to destroy any sense of safety or security that you may have had before meeting them. They want you on edge, always worried about what they might do next, or how they might react if something doesn’t go their way.
They thrive off fear and uncertainty because it makes them feel powerful when they know they’re in control of other people’s lives. Narcissists will do everything to make you feel unsafe, insecure, and unstable in your own life. Because it’s the only way they can control you.
Narcissists want to know they can make you feel hopeless, so they’ll do things like to destroy your self-esteem, tear down your self-confidence, and make you question everything about yourself. They can make you feel like you’re standing on the edge of a cliff with no way to get back up to solid ground.
Number 4: Your belief that you deserve a happy life.
They want to control everything in their lives, so they need to make sure you are not happy or fulfilled. The narcissist will break your belief that you deserve a happy life; they will do everything they can to make it seem like you’re the problem when they are in fact the problem.
You will never be able to get them to see how damaging their behavior is because narcissists lack empathy. Narcissists have an uncanny ability to make you feel like your needs are never going to be met, and that you should just resign yourself to this fact.
They do this by constantly putting you down, criticizing your choices, comparing you to other people, and making fun of the important things. Narcissists don’t want you to be happy; they want you to be miserable because misery is what they feel.
Number 5: Your ability to trust people even yourself.
They are experts at exploiting your weaknesses and using them against you until there’s nothing left but an empty shell of your former self. They are often very charming at first glance- making it easy for them to be real people with promises of love and happiness. Over time, those same promises start wearing thin on their victims, eventually becoming empty promises.
Suppose a narcissist has convinced you that no one else will ever love or care about you as they do. In that case, it’s easy for them to convince you to keep secrets from friends and family members who would otherwise be there for support when things go wrong.
Number 6: Your Peace Of Mind And Sanity.
They are experts at making you feel like you’re the problem, so they can avoid taking responsibility for their actions. They’ll constantly point out your flaws and imperfections, and they’ll do it in a way that makes it seem like you’re the only one who’s ever made any mistakes. You have no right to be upset about their behavior because it’s somehow your fault.
They destroy any sense of peace or calm in your home by instilling constant conflict. Narcissists are masters at driving crazy, they make you doubt your sanity, whether it’s gaslighting you into believing that you’re crazy or just straight up making you feel like the world is coming to an end.
This can be done through subtle manipulations or flat-out telling you that you’re crazy when they know it’s not true. The narcissist might even use your mental health issues against you by saying they caused your problems with them.
Number 7: Your Desire To Do Anything Productive Or Creative Ever Again.
Narcissists don’t just destroy your self-esteem and confidence; they also ruin your drive to do anything productive or creative ever again. They just suck all the life out of you and then leave you in a heap on the floor.
It’s not just that they’ll attack your hobbies, they’ll make you feel like you’re a fraud if you try to follow your dreams- they’ll tell you that any effort you put into anything is a waste of time and talent because you are not as good as them or anyone at all.
Number 8: Your ability to feel, joy love, or happiness in any form.
Narcissists are the worst kind of people you can imagine, and they’ll stop at nothing to get what they want. They make you feel like garbage, narcissists will take away your ability to feel joy. And they do this by gaslighting you into thinking that everything is your fault and that you are just making things up when they do bad things to you.
They also take away your ability to experience love by manipulating you into believing that you don’t deserve it. No one could ever love someone like you anyway. And if anyone does show signs of affection toward you, it’s because they’re trying to get something from you.
Narcissists will also destroy your happiness by constantly making sure that every conversation is about them and their needs, whether or not they’ve done anything wrong.
Number 9: Your Belief That You Deserve To Be Treated With Respect and Dignity.
They are experts at convincing you that you don’t deserve to be treated well; they’ll keep you stuck in the cycle of thinking that you’re not good enough. So, they’ll do things like constantly pointing out your flaws or making fun of your accomplishments.
This makes it easier for narcissists to manipulate you into believing that their way is the only way, so they abuse you until they get what they want. If you’re going to be happy, this is what you need to do- that is what the narcissist wants you to believe.
The narcissist will move on to another victim because that’s how narcissists operate, they don’t want someone who will stand up for themselves and fight back when they’re being mistreated.
Instead, they look for someone who will cower before them so that they can feel superior. And then, when they’ve entirely beaten down any sense of self-respect or value in yourself.
Number 10: Your faith in humanity.
Narcissists destroy any sense of faith in humanity by making you think no one else could possibly understand how much pain they cause. They’ll pull out all the stops to make sure you never trust anyone again, they’ll repeatedly tell you that people are out to get you that everyone is selfish and greedy and that no one cares about themselves.
It’s easy to start believing it, especially if you are prone to feeling isolated or lonely, but don’t buy into the narcissist’s lies. There are plenty of people, who care about others and want to help them, so don’t let one bad apple spoil the whole bunch. They know how to destroy and break you, it’s their specialty!
They’ll do whatever it takes to get under your skin, so don’t let them break you down. They don’t treat everyone the same way; they don’t treat anyone particularly well. Narcissists just do what works for them at any given moment in time.
And if they see something in someone else that they like or admire or would like to use to their advantage, they’ll take it. No matter what the cause is to that person or anyone else involved.
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