Number 4: Give Up Hoping and Accept Them as They Are
One of the main reasons you stay so long in a narcissistic relationship is that you hold on to what I call hopeless hope. Hope that the narcissist will change, hope that they will keep the promises, hope that things will get better, and hope that the future you dreamed of will finally come true.
Despite all the manipulation and lies, you stay hopeful until the very end, and even after things end, you still hope that they will return. You believe that there is a chance for things to improve, but that never happens. To set yourself free and win, you need to stop hoping things will be different because you are dealing with a lost cause, a hopeless situation that will never change.
The only person deserving any hope in the situation is you. The hope to heal and recover, the hope to move on and never look back. Real winning is accepting that they lured you in through an illusion. The real person never existed, and there was no connection at all. The good memories you hold on to are just breadcrumbs that, in reality, were insignificant things that an empathetic stranger would have done for you or with you.
Number 5: The last thing and the most important one
Number 5: You Have Already Won Against the Narcissist
Here is how: you can love yourself and face your fears and shame if you wish to do so, but a narcissist cannot and doesn’t do the same. They’re the biggest cowards who keep running from themselves. You have a true persona and do not operate from fake personas or masks. You can emerge from your trauma with the traits of your humanness intact, but a narcissist kills and forsake their humanity to escape their rottenness. You have your true identity/self-intact, but narcissists do not.
Instead, they create a lie called a false self to escape the truth. They choose easy over right. They operate and function through a sense of self that is fragile. You aren’t afraid to express emotions and show vulnerability because you can connect and attach properly.
Quite the opposite, a narcissist shows none and never forms true connections. They keep jumping through hoops to find happiness, but fail terribly. They have to lie, cheat, steal, cover-up, and lead double lives to survive, but they do not have to do so.
In a nutshell, if you want to win against a narcissist, you have to do and be the opposite of what they want you to do and how they want you to be to set yourself free.
Read More: 8 Signs Of A Malignant Narcissist
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